Today I have been (not-so) lucky enough to experience a whole new symptom of MS. Maybe I have experienced it before but in those certain circumstances I didn’t feel like it completely came out of the blue. For example, a long day, I was tired and had walked a little more than normal before heading out for dinner, drinks and a concert. So, when I felt like “whoa I may fall right through the crowd from way up here and to the bottom of this coliseum” it didn’t completely have me stumped. Not like today.
When I woke up this morning, after a somewhat restless night because of my daughters’ bad dreams, I almost fell right back down on to the bed. Shaking it off and giving myself a mental pep talk I got up and carried on. I got my daughter to school and came back home to study. Suddenly it was back. Did I take too many pills by accident? Did I miss them all together? Why am I so dizzy? Well, reading a textbook wasn’t going to happen. Clearly, I couldn’t shake this……it is a feeling I have not experienced before and it was no fun at all.
That led to a restless nap. Hoping it was a thing of the past, I got up and dammit! There it was again. One thing I can say for sure is this disease keeps me on my toes- it is always changing! Often finding it necessary to laugh it off…..I carry on! It goes back to one of my favorites about not being able to control what happens to you but you can control your reaction. So, I dust myself off and accept that I am stumbling and dizzy right now….but tomorrow is a whole new day to smile through, hopefully with a little more grace. Keep smiling